Thoughts Free Flow

Even though I've known for most of my life that I wanted to write it really wasn't until the last few years that it became necessary—not just as a background desire, rather a demanding presence in the fore. No matter where I am or what I am doing, I am always at least partially thinking about whatever my latest writing project is. This absolutely does not stop. Actual words spring to mind sporadically, specific phrasings of specific imagined scenes, which I usually try to get written down if I can—wherever I may be.

Not to say that it's all actually any good. Just that it is. Sometimes it feels like an affliction, like constant streaming audio (or sometimes, cinematic video) broadcast down from some roving satellite that I simply can't turn off. Most of it might be static, but literal words get through randomly and they're not bad. And if I fail to write some of it down somehow, as is often the case, when later try and rewrite the same scene, the wording isn't as good. It's already passed.

I might just be nuts, too.

Oh, by the way, I'm very much in the brainstorming stage of the reinvention of my website, Ashlock.org, which may arise soon-ish with the help of a very prolific friend. If anyone has any genuine ideas of what they'd like to see on that website, please let me know either right here or by email. I really want my site to be useful and enjoyable. Right now it's just...bleh.

We're up to Escapee episode 43 now, by the way.

Also in recency, I've become quite responsive to the Texas-based bands Flyleaf and Blue October, or at least to their albums, the self-titled Flyleaf and Foiled respectively. If anyone's interested in a sample, let me know.

In closing, despite all this self-indulgent drivel, I want to say again that the most unsung person I know personally is my wife, whose burdens are many and respites are few. I want to give her everything I can, unworthy as I feel.

Birthdays and Weddings

Today is my wife's birthday, and she's home and sick with a nasty, unforgiving cold. Not the ideal celebratory situation and one I really wish I could remedy somehow. As it is, I'm at work and as swamped with work as ever. It's also rainy out.

Speaking of rain, it rained all weekend in Indiana, where Marisa and I attended Ed and Lara's wedding. Congratulations the joint writer/editor duo, and you can read the truth behind this union at Choose Death. The ceremony was refreshingly simple and sweet and the space—University of Indiana's Cultural Art Center—was airy, bright, and green, qualities we didn't have at our own autumn-dark wedding. Which makes me think, early Spring and mid-autumn are probably the best time for a wedding. Followed by midwinter, and ultimately, summer (blech).

Escapee 41 went up last week.

Beneath a Lonely Desert Sun

The next episode in Escapee, episode 40, is up now. Finally. You should check out the latest look of Josh's Sidedown anyway, and some of the accolades he's getting at other sites. Go look. Now.

We're—Marisa and myself—mostly set now for GenCon this year. The big Goodman Games tournament I contributed one room to, so I'm hoping to stop in and see what that all looks like. Harley is running a module, but the registration was full within 10 minutes of it becoming available. Regardless, I hope to stop in and see the most energetic geekmaster in Indiana that day do his thing. Turns out one of the modules I wrote is also going to be run by some GM (game master) who Goodman appointed—I can't truly convey how weird that is to me. And that single session, too, has a full registration. Of course, that's a testament to the popularity of Goodman's Dungeon Crawl Classic series, but it's cool to be a part of it.

I'm still holding my breath on something else, so that's all for now for me.

One more thing I want to say. My wife is amazing. While I'm juggling the franticness (I think 'franticity' should be a word) of my dayjob and an attempted writing career, she's fighting half the world and challenging the entire Medicare/Medicaid system just so her parents can stay alive. Her father lives on an oxygen machine and her mom needs total knee replacement surgery imminently and they have but a trickle of an income. Securing medical coverage is a feat in itself. I swear, if Marisa wasn't draining herself dry fighting for the things she does, everyone around her would be a pale shadow of themselves. Myself included.

Some days are stressful beyond expression, but I always feel I was both fortunate and wise in marrying her. I keep at my desk a picture of her but also a plant she once gave me. The plant's name is Marisa II.